You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
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