yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
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