using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
Randomize
