I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
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