How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
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