My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Randomize