I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
Randomize
