i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
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