she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
Randomize
