I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize