for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
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