They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
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