The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
Randomize
