What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
Randomize