You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
Everything about him screamed your future.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
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