Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
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