wat bout pragnant strippers??
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
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