I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
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