I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
Acid is not a monday night drug
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
I love you. Go after that dick
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
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