Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
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