Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Randomize