is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
So he ended up having sex with me, but it was so awkward. When it was over, he went to the bathroom, and he came back and asked, "are you on your period or something? there's blood on my dick..." and i said, "well it was supposed to start today, nice surprise...i am so embarrassed." and he said ,"it's better than you queefing." and as soon as he said that, i queef the hardest and loudest i ever had.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
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