Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
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