are you still at the devil's house?
1:32a: I quit. signing up for eharmony. Don't judge
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
Randomize