Quick, to the slutcave!
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
I want her autograph on my taint
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
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