textsfromlastnight.com keeps rejecting me
that alone proves you never get laid, nor have a life.. or have anything funny to contribute to the world.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
Remember when I was real fucked up and said I would give up utensils and only use chopsticks for lent?...just got the reminder on my phone.
Randomize
