there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
Randomize
