party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
Randomize