Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
Randomize
