your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
mom just said that her bf is good in bed. fml.
i am watching a movie about a vagina with teeth and then you sent that to me while im eating sushi.
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
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