But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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