tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize
