remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
Randomize
