"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
Randomize
