just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
Changed all my ex bf's names to "no" in my phone so the next time I try to drunk text one of them it'll basically be like Russian roulette
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
Randomize