Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
She told me I should be a condom model.
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
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i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
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