Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
I'm always down for nudity.
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
