I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
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