No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
Randomize
