i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
He sent me a snapchat of himself growing a double chin. I think we're past the stage where there's any risk of us sleeping together. Ever.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
Randomize
