Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
I'm jealous of your bromance
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
Randomize
