Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
Randomize
