yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
Randomize
