Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
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Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
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