I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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