so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
Randomize