guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
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