Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
Randomize
