I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
the new apple iphone has a feature that can find itself if you lose it, apple is getting closer to making a phone completely drunkproof...
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
Randomize
