You really coming over, don't trick.
So I've decided that when I turn 50 and have to have a colonoscopy I'm going to leave a surprise for the doctor to find.
even my farts smell like vagina
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
Randomize