she kept yelling 'call me bella'
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
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